The Stoic Trick To Stop Wanting Things
You Know They're Not Worth Their Price, so Why Not Undesire Them?
Watch the video version.
Fancy cars, a seemingly-prestigious job, or a vacation home on the beach all sound great in theory, but what do we have to give up to get them? Often, the tradeoffs aren’t worth it.
The Roman Emperor and philosopher Marcus Aurelius had a trick to free himself of these wants: “Strip away the legend that encrusts them,” he told himself.
“This noble vintage is grape juice,” Marcus reminded himself, “and the purple robes are sheep wool dyed with shellfish blood.”
“…Like seeing roasted meat and other dishes in front of you and suddenly realizing: This is a dead fish. A dead bird. A dead pig. Perceptions like that—latching on onto things and piercing through them, so we see what they really are. That’s what we need to do all the time—all through our lives when things lay claim to our trust—to lay them bare and see how pointless they are, to strip away the legend that encrusts them.”
It’s possible to “undesire,” what you previously wanted. Unburdening yourself from wanting feels like a weight off your shoulders. So figure out what lust cost you virtue, peace of mind, or a balanced life, and start jettisoning them.
This is great, detachment is key. On the finance end, while not quite the same, I have another trick that I will feature in a future write up: the Stranger Test.
Should you want to buy something, imagine a stranger offering you the item or value of the item in cash. Which do you choose?
If you choose the cash, you shouldn't buy it. You need to detach yourself from fleeting desires.